Shifty Lover (mp3)

Sometimes I sing (badly) and record it. In this case, it was partly a character song, but also a general song at all. My character Dreor is complicated and trying to explain how she loves completely but is a difficult lover to have is hard to get across. She's a bit of a mess, but she likes who she is and could never change totally, no matter how being in love might bring out another side of her. But this song also happened because I think love is never perfect, and neither are people. Sometimes love is a different flavor than that romanticized and fairy-taled style we so often believe until we get a taste of reality.

This is NOT my typical or preferred style for singing, but since folks were sleeping in the house at the time, I had to keep it down and sing almost under my breath. I wanted to get it down before I forgot the melody (I can't read/write music). Er, so here it is. Sorry 'bout the awful sound quality and the weird clicks.

Lyrics:
Let me love you
And adore you
But don't let me get too near
I can kiss like
Sun and honey
But my mood may disappear
You've been nothing
But understanding
You've adapted and let go
You've weathered rages with such patience
So surely you cannot be thrown

Sometimes I scream away the mornin'
Sometimes I tear the day apart
Sometimes I just don't wanna love you
But that doesn't stop my heart

I'll do tender
I'll do sweetly
Until I change my mind again
You can hold me
You control me
Until I start craving some sin
It's not like you
Didn't know this
It's not like you couldn't see
When I whisper my "I love you"s
Remember it's not always me

Sometimes I scream away the mornin'
Sometimes I tear the day apart
Sometimes I just don't wanna love you
But that doesn't stop my heart

Sometimes I scream away the evening
Sometimes I tear our world apart

Sometimes I refuse to be gentle
Sometimes I get a little mean
Sometimes I act so wildchild
But you're the quiet inside me

Let me love you
I adore you
But don't let me get too near
And if I claim that I don't love you
Just pretend you didn't hear